Random

I'm an awesome dad + I'm a bad spellar + I'm most happy when I'm making other people smile + I speak Italian + I'm a stand-up comedian + I'm addicted to Carmex. + "I like big butts and I cannot lie" + Whenever I read aloud to children, I yawn uncontrollably + I can't keep a straight face + I'm still obsessed with The Cure + I can 'gleek' + Peeling labels off of cold beer bottles + I get a horrible case of the giggles at inappropriate times (funerals, weddings, etc.) with zero ability to keep it in + I wasn't allowed to watch 'Silver Spoons' because Ricky Schroeder said, "sucks". That sucked. + I use way too many napkins when I eat + I've never seen 'Bambi' + I'm a backseat driver, courtesy of my grandma + I like strong handshakes, courtesy of my grandpa (I will judge yours) + Popping bubble wrap + I hate the sound of my voice on recordings + Lazy Sundays in pajamas due to restless Saturdays 'out of pajamas' + Chicks with glasses are sexy. Chicks with monocles are not + Wine tasting (and another taste...and another taste...and another taste) + I have the ability to get really annoying songs stuck in your head + "Fatherhood" is my favorite F-word + If I really think about sex (I mean *really* think about it), I sneeze + I can make beer + I'm half Italian, half Irish, all dork + I gross out on dirty microwaves and crumbs in the butter + Grazing on free samples at grocery stores + If I could smoke a Girl Scout Thin Mint, I would + I act in commercials and independent films. + Horizontal stripes + Sun-dried laundry + I'm too lazy to get out the ironing board. I iron everything on the floor + Molding Rice-Krispie Treats into perverted shapes + French Kissed: 7th grade. French Tickled: None of your business + Hitting the snooze button (the snooze button is the pimp slap for clocks) + Watching black and white movies + The smell of Play-Doh and crayons reminds me of childhood + Bjork + I'm a good person not because I fear Hell, but because I fear Jail + My life's goal is to play 'Plinko' on The Price is Right + Eye contact + I give. They take. Rise. Repeat + I hate musicals - even the one you were about to suggest. + I get the hiccups whenever I eat a Burger King Whopper. It's worth the risk + I still secretly giggle when people say "Nutcracker" or "Don we now our gay apparel" + Thunderstorms + Wearing warm, over-sized sweaters - the kind that look like you should be eating clam chowder + I rarely eat candy, but if I do it's a 'Reese's' (I steal them from my kids when I "inspect" their Halloween candy) + Creativity in any form + Holding hands + Farmer's markets + Building blanket forts + Erogenous zones + I'd travel an hour to hear you laugh for one minute + I don't get embarrassed - unless a waitress is singing a birthday song to me + I can't swallow capsules. I will put them in a marshmallow and pretend I'm chewing it + I could eat Mexican (food) every day + Playing board games with my kids (and actually trying to win) + Quoting obscure lines from 80's movies ("I gave her my heart, she gave me a pen" - Say Anything) + Licking the bowl + I'm a sucker for brown eyes + Ordering appetizers + I miss having grandparents + I coach kid's soccer. After every game - win or lose - I ask them the same question, "Did you do your best?" + I hate the smell of Curry, so I won't even try it + My friends in Italy thought my name was 'Bread' - and I never corrected them + I'm not a leg man, ass man, or feet man. In general, I like body parts I don't already have + I can't sleep unless there is a fan running + Putting potato chips on my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches + Whenever I'm in a boring meeting and someone says 'stakeholder', I pretend they said, 'steak holder' and 'meating' + The bay leaf always ends up on my plate + Confidence + If I go to a store or restaurant on a holiday, I always thank the employees for working that day + I hate to see people get hurt, but I love to watch them fall. + Catching Fireflies + First Dates + Laughing until my stomach hurts + Seeing old people who are still in love + Choose Your Own Adventure books. (everything deserves a better ending) + Buying something from the ice cream truck (probably a "Drum Stick") + Going out for breakfast (with 'bed-head') + If you rearrange the letters of my last name, it spells "HeeMan" + Biographies about weirdos + Toasting marshmallows + I can solve a Rubik's Cube...or I could + Anticipation and excitement on Christmas Eve + I once ate a flower in protest of not being able to keep a stray dog. We kept the stray dog (flower power) + The first snowfall of the season + I used to write wishes on toilet paper and flush them down the toilet. Wishes are the sh*t + I get choked-up during chick-flicks. Don't judge + My favorite feature on a woman is hair - but not body hair. + My favorite sound is hearing kids laugh, especially if I caused it. + Hugs and kisses, just because + I'm a 'people person' who hates people + I've removed a mole with nail clippers. It bled for a week + Cotton candy at baseball games + I'd rather save a letter than a picture + Taking naps on rainy days + Cuddling on the couch + Low-mileage moms (with the 'new car' smell) + I share a birthday with "Ralph Malph" from Happy Days, so 'sit on it'+ First sip of coffee in the morning + My favorite day is Sunday (or Taco Tuesday) + I hate when my hands smell like food. I have to wash them immediately after I eat + I gag uncontrollably on dental x-rays + I'm horrible with directions - you have to reduce them down to 'left' and 'right' instead of 'west' and 'east' + Soaking my feet in hot water. Ahhh... + Green Bay Packers + Reading the "Missed Connections" in the personal ads (desperate, but strangely romantic) + Documentaries + I talked so much in school that I had to bring a note home from 3rd grade each Friday that said whether or not I could watch 'CHiPs' (Side Note: I was "Ponch" for Halloween that year) + Butterflies in my stomach + Sharp insults, sharper comebacks + I've been to more countries than States + I hate pie crust + Smoking ribs (in a smoker, not a bong) + I prefer dark meat (turkey, not dicks) + 80's metal hair bands + Petting zoos are disgusting + Chamomile tea on a cold night + I avoid chain restaurants to seek out the unique treasures + I can barely write in cursive - I stopped in 5th grade and it shows (people think I write like a doctor) + Flirting with my girl from across the room + I read magazines from back to front + I sleep on top of the covers with my own blanket + Being immersed a good book + I barely graduated high school but I graduated Cum Laude from college. + Brunettes are yummy + My favorite season is Fall + Sitting outside by the patio fireplace + Limoncello + Old school video games (Pac Man, Frogger, Joust, Defender, etc) + I've never seen an episode of Star Trek, but I'm a big nerd + I've never faked a sarcasm + Tailgating at sporting events + People watching + My left thumb is double-jointed + I let the water run when I brush my teeth + I'm afraid of snakes, clowns, and drag queens + I go to bed wearing socks, but kick them off during the night. You can always find 20 or 30 stray socks under the bed + I like the smell of birthday candles when you blow them out + I never shake the presents. I want to be completely surprised