Thursday, December 15, 2005

Holiday Roast

This morning I did some Chief's commentary on 610 Sports. I took shots at everyone, including Danni Boatwright's brother, who thinks his sister is 'HOT' (Danni won this year's Survivor and works for 610 Sports). Here is some of the dialogue:

I have a little cold, but I’m feeling great. I'm more excited than Danni Boatwright's brother at a family reunion.

The Chief's are still in the Wild Card race even though last week they stunk it up worse than Jason Whitlock with a colon full of ‘Go Chicken Go.’ Larry Johnson had his sixth-straight game with over 100 yards and he’s racking up more points than Tim Grunhard’s driver’s license. I haven’t seen a brotha this great on his feet since "Leroy" from Fame. He's like the Tiger Woods of football, except he's black.



On the other side of the ball, Jarred Allen added two more sacks totaling 19. That makes him hotter than a crack pipe at Michael Irvin's. He's had more sacks and loose balls than a lawn chair at the John Knox Retirement Village.

Let me briefly discuss the Jason Whitlock Roast. Apparently, someone wanted to roast an overweight, talentless media figure. But, Brian Busby was busy; so, they got Jason Whitlock to fill in. Tuesday the Gem Theater was filled with Chiefs and drunks. I felt like I died and woke up at an Eric Warfield intervention. Everyone who was ‘no one’ was there. Even Jeff George flew in for the roast. I haven’t seen that much washed up talent in one room since U.S.A. for Africa sang, “We Are the World.”

Sticking with the "Bad Writers" theme, they're roasting Bill Romanowski next year. Maybe Gary Hogeboom will fly in.