Wednesday, April 07, 2010

A day in the life of a dad

Here's a instant message recap of an incident I had on Monday at a restaurant with my family.

I'm "Bread" and Jay is a buddy of mine

(9:36:56 AM) Bread: do you have a Red Robin in LR?
(9:37:00 AM) Bread: or where ever you are
(9:37:02 AM) Jay A.: nah
(9:37:16 AM) Bread: it's a sit-down hamburger restaurant.
(9:37:23 AM) Bread: went there for 'kids eat free' night on monday. free balloons and sht
(9:37:30 AM) Bread: and connor asked to go to the bathroom
(9:37:37 AM) Bread: he was in there for a while
(9:37:41 AM) Bread: so i went to check on him to make sure he wasn't in there with some crazy who thought it was 'eat kids free' night.
(9:37:46 AM) Jay A.: oh no
(9:37:52 AM) Jay A.: poo?
(9:37:54 AM) Bread: no
(9:37:55 AM) Bread: worse
(9:37:57 AM) Bread: I walk in
(9:38:02 AM) Bread: and he's STANDING
(9:38:04 AM) Bread: on
(9:38:05 AM) Bread: top
(9:38:05 AM) Bread: of
(9:38:06 AM) Bread: the
(9:38:08 AM) Bread: urinal
(9:38:11 AM) Jay A.: what!?
(9:38:16 AM) Jay A.: why?
(9:38:19 AM) Bread: speechless
(9:38:21 AM) Bread: have NO idea
(9:38:25 AM) Bread: he climbed it
(9:38:43 AM) Bread: something in his head said, "Hey, a urinal...i should climb that"
(9:38:55 AM) Bread: so we go back to the table
(9:39:11 AM) Bread: and he says, You're not going to tell your friends are you?
(9:39:21 AM) Jay A.: haha
(9:39:27 AM) Bread: "not only am i going to tell my friends, i'm going to tell everyone i ever meet"
(9:39:33 AM) Jay A.: haha
(9:39:35 AM) Bread: i'm going to tell complete strangers
(9:39:39 AM) Bread: about how proud i was
(9:39:48 AM) Bread: to see my son reach the summit of Mt. Urinal
(9:39:55 AM) Bread: w/no sherpa or oxygen tank
(9:40:07 AM) Jay A.: :)
(9:40:10 AM) Bread: just the garanimals on his back
(9:40:28 AM) Bread: he's got a few chromosomes of idiot in there somewhere
(9:40:50 AM) Jay A.: i just blasted a boog out of my nose reading that

...more

(11:30:20 AM) Chris Meehan: dude I spit a mouth full of almonds out all over my keyboard when I read he had climbed the urinal
(11:30:30 AM) Bread: HAHAHAHA
(11:30:47 AM) Chris Meehan: WTF was the boy thinking?
(11:31:08 AM) Bread: dood. i sat back down at the table and was literally speechless
(11:31:47 AM) Chris Meehan: was he going to do a backflip off the top and land in the tiny pool of water in the urinal. Like one of those high divers that land in a baby pool in Mexico
(11:32:17 AM) Bread: maybe he was going to do the Triple Lindy


(12:04:27 PM) Chris Meehan: Well I know what to get connor for his birthday
(12:04:37 PM) Chris Meehan: climbing boots with spikes and a speedo





Visit Kansas City Comedian Brad Meehan at www.BradMeehan.com

Email Me brad@bradmeehan.com